Be quiet and deals will be quiet

I write this as a personal lesson I’ve learned multiple times: staying quiet about your expectations—or assuming that others clearly understand them—can lead to unnecessary complications in any deal. This applies to everyone involved: those helping you, opposing you, or the ones you’re trying to win over.

In many instances, people think that being vague about what they want or need is helpful, either to keep others guessing or as part of some clever negotiation tactic. However, this approach rarely works. Instead, the other parties end up spending more time trying to figure out what you actually want, which often results in them missing the mark entirely and failing to deliver what you truly need.

Every opening statement in a negotiation should start with a clear explanation of what you need and want, along with the timeline you’re working toward. When you do this, the other party focuses their efforts on figuring out how to meet your needs, rather than second-guessing your intentions. By doing so, you shift the focus onto your timeline and priorities, gaining control and influence—key factors in successful deal-making.

Now, let’s explore what happens when you don’t follow this rule.

Imagine Sally, a legal team member, has been working tirelessly on revising a contract with you and the rest of the team for months. She’s fatigued and mentions that she has competing priorities, but she assures you she’ll have the revision ready by early next week. You’re aware, however, that you need to close this by Monday afternoon at the latest. Instead of being explicit about the deadline, you vaguely request that she expedite the process.

When Monday comes, you ping Sally, only to learn that she’s still working on the revision. Now you’re in a bind. If you suddenly spring the firm Monday afternoon deadline on her, Sally will likely feel blindsided and frustrated. You risk damaging your credibility for future deals and will need to spend additional time convincing her to prioritize your request.

This situation—and the stress it causes—could have been avoided if you had been crystal clear from the outset.

This rule doesn’t just apply to business; it’s equally relevant in personal relationships, including marriage (just a little FYI).

[Or any other form of personal connection.]